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Digitalizing Demons

I got a digitalizing notebook with erasable paper. This means I can write initial drafts by hand and then edit/finalize a post online later.


I am having a difficulty in that the text conversion doesn’t appreciate my all caps handwriting. But writing with little letters looks childish and wrong and I hate how it shows up on the page!

Much less how [much] more difficult it is to actually change my standard writing method like that..

So I’ll track down a font that will do me right … or I guess write .

Get it? Cuz I’m writing right. 😀

I wonder if this will assist me in getting more posts up on Lucenti. I got it intending to use it for a bullet journal. Re-usable & able to digitize if wanted?! Sign me the fuck up.

Anyway, I’m feeling better (maybe) than my previous post, but also I am back on track with my hormones. Experimented with a new schedule and I suppose it doesn’t work. My bigger problem was that doing my t-shot every 2 weeks made it more difficult to remember if I’d forgotten for longer than I should. so I ended up w/ only 2 shots in 2 months as I went through wrapping stuff up w/ the center and packing up & actually traveling and then finding a new place to live and getting to know a new place & tracking down a new work situation and helping a friend here out and … I forgot .

The interesting thing about forgetting with hormones is that my body has a very interesting way of reminding me why they are important to maintain. And that led to sensations and a bodily experience I’d not encountered in .. 10 years? You might think I would be devastated or angry.

I thought about how I should be more dysphoric, have stronger feelings about the thing yet.. I was annoyed, sure. I didn’t feel good physically and even had to spend a day sleeping just to “catch up.”

But my mind didn’t succumb to anguish and I wasn’t rendered emotionally incapable. I was generally… okay.

Hence the post about demons.

Are they still even here?

app scan of the notebook page


app scan of journal page 2

computer says no…

How do you know when (if?) you’ve subdued your demons? I use subdue since I currently ponder whether they were worth defeating or instead required befriending to finally calm the internal conflict. I can’t think of many demons inside of me right now that are creating friction of any kind. My work demon feels external, but my logic daemon has all that sorted and in motion. I will soon…

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Writers block got me like… That reminder I set for myself on my phone, but that I keep changing the next day. That friend you keep meaning to text, but totally forget to for weeks on end. The deep cleaning you promised yourself you would do when the weather finally turned warm, but you want to make sure it’s warm for just a couple extra days before you get…

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